The Love I Never Knew

Valentine’s Day is around the corner and probably the most celebrated day after Christmas. You could see couples going out on special date nights that are well planned out. The florist shop earns higher revenues on this day -each busy delivering a door-to-door service to homes and offices and holiday destinations are fully booked just to celebrate the togetherness of the other person that we call ours.

I always had a different idea of love when I was growing up. I always desired a romantic, lovey-dovey person that could just send me sweet text messages all day long, leaving me to daydream about him with my eyes open (if you are a teenager you could totally relate to this). But as life evolved for me I started understanding the other side of love that I never knew.

What is love?  Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hope, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Wow! That’s a whole lot of lengthy explanation just for this one word called love? Yes. Love makes the world go crazy and it drives people crazy to do everything and anything for that one special person. However, we still witness failed marriages, break-ups, abuse and violence in a relationship.

I grew up with a single mother. She showered us all (my sibling & I) with genuine love and kindness. Mommy made us laugh and smile and she has never failed to put up a smile even when it hurts her the most. Her love is beyond every limitation in this world. I can come home from work after a stressful day in the office and mommy’s brightest aura and affection will lighten up my soul. This here is genuine love. My mother’s love is kind and not self-seeking. Over a period of time in my life, the idea of love also grew and changed. I came across people that had taught me how to love when it is undeserving. Similarly, I forgave my ex-father and learned how to love him in my own pace.

I had fallen in love and fallen out of love and my oh my, I got my heart broken along this process.

Love really is not a feeling. It is a ‘verb’ as I like to say, and from it springs a wealth of emotions that motivate you to accept imperfections, to see yourself and see how you can contribute to making a good life, relationship and marriage work. That connection that makes discussions meaningful, that makes disagreements workable and fun times filled with laughter.

So if you think that love is all about chocolates and meet-ups in the mall then you are so wrong my friend. Real love is caring about the happiness of another person without wanting anything in return. Imagine that I tell you I love you. I smile at you, speak kind words to you, and perhaps even present you with a gift of some kind. Understandably, you enjoy this, as we all would. This is an act of genuine kindness. This is the kind of real love I never knew. Happy Valentines Day! What’re your ideal thoughts about love? Share it with me.

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